SOLACE: Soul + Grief

This podcast is sponsored by SOULPLUSGRACE serving the San José/Santa Cruz area, offering grief support and grief journeying with spirituality. I hope to help you travel through grief with God at your side.

"I am a trained Spiritual Director for those who seek to complete the 19th Annotation of St. Igantius’ spiritual exercises OR seek spiritual direction while grieving. I have also worked as a hospital/cemetery chaplain and grief doula. I believe all paths lead to God and that all traditions are due respect and honour. I take my sacred inspiration from all of my patients and companions–past, present and future; the Dalai Lama, James Tissot, St. John of the Cross, the Buddha, Saint Teresa of Ávila, and, of course, Íñigo who became known as St. Ignatius. I utilize art, poetry, music, aromatherapy, yoga, lectio divina, prayer and meditation in my self-work and work with others. I believe in creating a sacred space for listening; even in the most incongruous of surroundings."

BACKGROUND

Jesuit Retreat Center, Los Altos, CA -- Pierre Favre Program, 3 year training to give the Spiritual Exercises of Saint Ignatius
Centro de Espiritualidad de Loyola, Spain -- The Spiritual Exercises of St Ignatius of Loyola -- 30 Day Silent Retreat
Center for Loss & Life Transition – Comprehensive Bereavement Skills Training (30 hrs) Ft. Collins, CO
California State University Institute for Palliative Care--Palliative Care Chaplaincy Specialty Cert. (90 hrs)
Sequoia Hospital, Redwood City, CA -- Clinical Pastoral Education
19th Annotation with Fumiaki Tosu, San Jose, CA, Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius
Santa Clara University, Santa Clara, CA M.A. – Pastoral Ministries

CONTACT ME: candeelucas@soulplusgrace.com with questions to be answered in future episodes.

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SOLACE: Soul + Grief

Notes from a Grief Journal

August 22, 2025 • Candee Lucas • Season 4 • Episode 34

0:00 | 13:20

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Journaling serves as both a memorial and milestone marker on our grief journeys, allowing us to process complex emotions and track our healing progress over time. Journal entries spanning several years document my experiences with various losses and the spiritual dimensions of grief.

• Grief journaling helps memorialize our journey and provides perspective on how far we've come
• Personal journal entries reveal the complex, non-linear nature of grief processing
• Spiritual themes weave throughout the journaling process, showing how faith can anchor us
• Metaphorical language helps express grief emotions that defy straightforward description
• The journey through grief includes moments of both profound despair and glimpses of comfort
• Writing creates a safe space to express emotions that might otherwise remain bottled up

A new episode drops every Friday morning on Spotify, Amazon, and Apple. If you have questions about grieving or spiritual direction, my contact information is in the show notes. Be gentle with yourself this week. Vaya con Dios.

You can reach me at: candeelucas@soulplusgrace.com.
SPIRITUAL DIRECTION WHILE GRIEVING IS AVAILABLE

Art: https://www.etsy.com/shop/vasonaArts?ref=seller-platform-mcnav
and https://fineartamerica.com/profiles/candee-lucas

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0F2SFH4Z6

Music and sound effects today by: via Pixabay

Welcome to Solace Grief Ministry

Candee 0:26

Welcome to Solace: Soul + Grief . I'm glad you're here . My name is Candee Lucas . I'm a grief chaplain and a spiritual director . When we founded this ministry nearly five years ago , we wanted to be available for people who have suffered any kind of loss , because the grief journey is so complex , because the grief journey is so complex , because we have so many things in life that we need to process through loss , that I wanted to be available in this format for people to review and revisit as time goes by . We're all on this grief journey together and you're always welcome in this circle of healing , love and support .

The Value of Grief Journaling

Candee 1:36

I have always mentioned journaling as a way to both memorialize your grief journey and more as a check-in for yourself to look back and see how far you've come . So I'd like to share with you today some journal entries I've made in the past to give you an example of how that process works . Some background

Journal Entries About Fear and Loss

Candee 2:12

. These entries deal with losses both recent and long ago .

Candee 2:18

J une 2nd , I have come to this place that seems safe , safest to me to do this work . I admitted obliquely that I am afraid to look at this grief , but what that will look like , what that image will be , remains to be seen . What is the size and nature of this fear ? Does it take on too much self-evaluation ? Lord , I am not worthy that you should come under my roof Speak , but the word and my soul shall be healed .

Candee 3:27

Early Morning: what is beyond the safe space ? Still the loss . Unable to put into words , unable to put a shape around . Too long a time to prepare and anticipate too , not in the spotlight undeferred to . Is this proper ? Is this proper ?

Candee 4:18

Midnight: she wanted me to make all the hard decisions and , after all , I have known him for 75 years .

Candee 4:36

April

Finding God Amid Profound Grief

Candee 4:37

Entry: A crying heart . I cannot stop ever because it is filled with love and sadness . August Entry I lost my way from my garden of grief and the path seemed obscured . I tried to walk down this path and after a few steps , my feet are cut and bleeding and I slump to the ground and make myself small and tears stream down .

Candee 5:34

Midnight:n I am lost , I am lost , I am lost . I see a far-off light , but it is oh so dim , like a candle that is already burning itself . Sad whispers whispers near me , saying words I don't yet recognize . I am lost , I am lost .

Candee 6:24

December entry: Keeping me safe is my God , my rabbi and my master . The ground is warm beneath my body is warm and soft with moss , and I lie down now , but the tears still come . The tears still come for all of them my baby and my love , mother and father , grandmothers and grandfathers , and the lives of all the women , most of whom left their lives and sailed across the ocean

Candee 7:23

Midnight: I cannot move from this spot on the path . I am on a path to a future obscure . They follow me . I miss them . I long to hold them, m ore; I long to be held by them . Will there be something more exquisite than the touch of that warm flesh ? Lie with me here , put your arms around me , move the hair from my eyes when you touch my face . Lord , will you lead me home ? Will I ever be ready to go with you ? How much I miss them .

Candee 8:36

May Entry-- it's entitled Askance . I lost my way again Later in that day , but God was still beside me . . My feet were still bleeding , my throat was still dry , my eyes still red and my heart still broken . Yet for an instant I was able to hold my baby , who never breathed in life , in my arms . She was perfect , beautiful and pink , with a rose-shaped mouth and beautiful rosy cheeks . I smelled her head and it touched deep inside me . I kissed her lightly , wrapped her pink blanket around her and handed her back to her father , who gently kissed me . Goodbye for . now

Candee 10:05

February: Then the mothers of my life came and made a circle around me and murmured in prayer Love is all . All is love . Alpha love , omega love . And then God came and wrapped us in his golden cord of love , his golden cord of love , and we disappeared into one perfect golden jewel to repose in the heart of God . Amen .

Healing Through Remembrance

Candee 10:59

May 22nd: It can be a time of rupture , both edges , raw , source , unknown really , but rupture nonetheless , cleaving into our hearts and lives , revealing hidden , smaller ruptures and dings , rifts and fissures . All these words reminding of the uneasy rock of our lives here

Closing Thoughts and Contact Information

Candee 11:47

on this earth .

Candee 11:57

That concludes another episode . Thanks for joining me . A new episode drops every Friday morning . You can always find us on Spotify , Amazon and Apple . Be gentle to yourselves this week . If you would like to contact me regarding questions about grieving or spiritual direction , my contact information is in the show notes . Be very gentle with yourself this week . Travel with God always near . Vaya con Dios . .